Tuesday, May 29, 2007

[Yao] We missed you too

Now that my god awful final paper is washed right out of my hair, it's time for juicy news...and lots of it.

DEATH!
Izumi Sakai of Zard died on the 27th in Keio University Hospital from a cerebral contusion. According to police reports, a passer-by found Sakai unconcious near the hospital, where she had been going for chemotherapy. She had apparently slipped on some wet surface and fell about 3 meters, hitting the back of her head on concrete.
I don't know if most of you know about Zard (tbh I never was a fan of their/her music) but that is pretty awful. She had an album and a tour planned! Although, Japan has some of the most slippery surfaces ever: do you know how many times I've slipped on those god awful manhole covers on the streets? Would it kill them to grind them down so that there's some traction? No, but let's all have a moment of silence for our favorite mid-90s Jpop queen.





[a somber moment of silence]



Okay, moving along, we have...

SEX!
According to the fabulous people over at Naispo, they've found the real reason Akanishi Jin went to "study" english:
he knocked up two underaged girls!
First, he slam dunk'd with an 'average high school girl' (average my ass, it was totally that harlot Hanako from 2-D) and got a 'stern repremand,' whatever that means. But natrually, only corporal punishment gets through to punks these days and JE is soft, so Jin went and did it again. He got some 'not yet famous, yet still rather profitable teen idol group's' middle-school member pregnant and apparently made her get an abortion. EDIT: and we have names! And JE, even quick to clean up messes, decided two strikes makes and out and shipped him off to the good U.S. of A., where he proceeded to put his semen in of-age white womenz. I hate the motherfucker, but you have to admit he is making his dreams of pimping around the world come true. All kattun needs now is an Asian tour and he'll be spreading his DNA all across the Silk Road. So relax crazy asian fans, he'll do you eventually. As long as you're not ugly. Which you probably are. Moving along...

CATTINESS!
The infamous Sawajiri-kai has been dissolved! And on SawaEri's birthday no less!
"Sawajiri and [Nakagawa] Shoko had a tussle over a certain Johnny's talent and that's when their relationship went sour and from there on the Sawajiri-kai collapsed in on itself. Sawajiri was always rather selfish and fickle, so she'd be quick to cut off relations as soon as there's any conflict. And on top of that she had a bad habit of stealing the boyfriends of members/friends." - An informant.
Well then, I guess the Nagasawa-kai has won by default. It's actually quite a shame because SawaEri's hilariously bitchy feats were just starting to become endearing. Also can we talk about how frumpy NagaMi looks recently? Very few people look good with a center parted greasy bob.




Insipid news of the month
Leah Dizon actually can speak Japanese, like, fluently?! NO WAI!!
Let's all be real here; she's hot. Do we really need her to talk? What, I can't speak for the 3 straight boys that read this blog?

Epherma

Creepy pictures of Yamapi's sister, who's a gravure idol:


large and in charge and 2x the creepy


source
source
source

We know you missed us. Now show us some love.

18 comments:

Shiz said...

fksljasd omg it is totally that girl from Berryz Koubou or w/e that Jin was rumored to be dating a few months ago. this is amazing. ilu yao. I hope this gets passed on to kattunlove-- *kicked.*

sauce said...

oh dewdz leah dizon is hawtshit.

personally i think she'd be better off doing ads for lingerie&swimsuits than entertainment. eh. eh. am i rite?

but at least she's popular enough to have her image mimicked in porn videos. hahaha

Anonymous said...

But the "Jin impregnated Chinami" was so last October...

Surely you have more dirt than this.

IzyClover said...

not really a fan of Zard
but yes it's still is very sad
that's Yamapi's sis?...0_0

and yes Leah Dizon is hot
but I watched Sakigake Vegas which she hosted
it was like really horrible
I mean yes she is hot and an eye candy
but she only needs to say very few words and it's in English...
and still she kinda stinks
apart from that I still think she's hot

I never really liked Jin too

Anonymous said...

And you probably want Jin to fuck you too but too bad you're too ugly for him to bother.

mattEEE said...

god, Leah is so horrible at everything except looking like a vapid whore.

Anonymous said...

wtfuck??? Jin fucked that Chinami girl???? jkbesffgbo;wefowigo;ihow;!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Woww..her lolz. Talk about being a pedophile O_O||||. He needs to keep his dick in check.

Cristina said...

The picture link of Yamapi's freaky sister isn't working. Darn, and I wanted to see it...
I believe Jin's a total dickhead, but getting H!P girl impregnated? Yeah right... that's so farfetched. She would've gotten kicked out already.
I need more juicy dirt here.

Nikki said...

I totally saw half of the above news on one single poster on the train.

Anonymous said...

fuck!!! i wish Jin will get aids!!!

Authentic Oriental Babes said...

Leah Dizon is da bomb!

Check out my tribute video to the goddess Leah Dizon =)

Anonymous said...

I knew Jin was one weird freak but I never knew he was that weird - maybe JE is expanding its "horizons" by transforming their boy bands into pedophiles and pimps so it can suck in more gullible she-men loving girls and get more cash (I don't think JE's guys are hot but rather abominations of mankind). Catastrophe I say!

Anonymous said...

I NEED MORE GOSSIP!!!!
loving your work, btw.

Anonymous said...

So anybody else hear the rumor about Matsumoto Jun apparently banging Suzuki emi?

Nevermind the impending dieaseses.
He's straight?

Anonymous said...

I DON'T KNOW IF I SHOULD HATE THIS SITE OR LOVE IT. BUT YOU GUYS WHO ARE UPDATING IT AND RUNNING IT ARE IDIOTS. AND PROBABLY UGLY, FAT WHORES WHO HAVE NO LIFE... and leah is HAWT!

MissMonika said...

I figured Jin was not altogether there. But I never knew how much of an idiot he is. Definitely has the mind of a goldfish.

shelby said...

wow that about jin is messed up. hahahahaha. I should've looked into that though.
(course, i didn't realize he was gone until he came back).

But you'd think that if he really studied englih for all that long, he would come back with something better than that crap "How is impression of Japan?". GAISEI!

anyway, like your site. (wtf?)

 

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